Mexico’s hottest vacation destination is on holiday! Puerto Vallarta is jammed mostly with locals this week as the snowbirds have returned to their US and Canuckland homes and the Vallartans have “taken back” their city. <OLE!!!>  Puerto Vallarta schools and most workplaces have closed for the annual “Semana Santa” (the Holy Week) and post Easter-week holiday vacations. Just like Mardi-Gras here. As in many European towns and cities, PV (today in about an hour) will stage (very dramatic and emotionally-moving) the “Living Stations of the Cross” that follows Christ’s last hour before His crucifixion. The crowds will follow “Jesus” down the malecon, and with an impressive production. Quite a pageant!!!!  Decorate those “huevos de Pasqua” tomorrow night (Easter eggs) and count your many blessings.

Read more about Puerto Vallarta, Mexico’s holidays- http://www.insidepv.com/Events-and-Entertainment/Inside-Puerto-Vallarta-Event-Calendar.htm

The lobby alone is worth a visit- a wide platform stairwell is surrounded by Koi ponds and impressive rock formations leading to the pool.  There’s a comfortable cocktail lounge here and a game section with everything from pool to foos ball.

The room was beautiful- large, very nicely decorated with comfortable beds and a full kitchen.  We also had a jacuzzi tub which worked for a little while and although they offered to send someone to fix it, they never showed.  Oh well, we got to enjoy it once   We had a great balcony which was spacey but not really private- A few ladies next door were caught spying on my fiance after he was out of the shower and became our frequent fans!

The pool was beautiful, located on a patio above the beach.  There was a fun slide off a rock formation but it was not turned on for the full duration of the pool hours so we unfortunately never had the chance to try it.  The pool opened at 9 AM and closed at 9 PM-  the slide was on from 11 AM to just after 6 PM- quite disappointing.

The staff was very friendly and helpful.  Service for poolside cocktails were fast once we started a tab.   Valet parking cost us around $3 USD a day and was well worth it.  They were fast getting our car and always helpful as far as providing information and directions.

We checked into our resort- which I’ll describe better in my next post. We checked in using our debit card to pay for the room (roughly $240 USD for 2 nights,) only to later discover a mistake was made and we were charged $600 USD at check in, and then $240 for the room when we checked out- a total of $840 USD. We were told the $600 was meant to be a “hold” for an open tab, and that the $600 would be returned to our account in “1 to 3 months.” Obviously, this was pretty shocking. For future Royal Villa Resort guests- don’t use your debit card at this resort!

Mazatlan itself was beautiful. It was much larger than Puerto Vallarta and sprawled out, and it certainly had a different feel to it. Since we only planned to stay in Mazatlan for 3 days, we decided to hire a taxi to give us a tour. It cost us $35 USD and included all the major areas of town, starting with the sunset from a very high peak. We went to the marketplace which was filled with vendors pushing souvenirs. We picked up a few small items before heading to old town. The parks here were absolutely beautiful, surrounded by well-maintained historic buildings, churches, and patio restaurants. We came back here the following day for daylight photos.

The Shrimp Bucket was our choice for breakfast. We dined with birds. No, I’m not joking- there were pigeons and sparrows on and off our table, under our feet, and flying over our heads. It was great.  Oh and the food was fantastic and surprisingly cheap.

Casa Manana’s rooms were cute and very clean.  Beds were hard but that’s typical of Mexico.  We really loved our balcony which looked out over the pool and the ocean.  We had a fantastic sunset from this point and made it a point to run upstairs to the rooftop terrace for a few photos.

Did I mention Casa Manana’s oceanview room was only $58 USD?   There was also free wireless internet and they offered simple conveniences- such as when I realized my phone card was low and asked where I could buy one; the receptionist pulled out a handful of cards and asked which kind I would like saving me a trip into town.  I love when they think of the little things!

It’s freaking cheap! Where else can you rent a condo a block from the beach for $500 USD!

You can buy a teenie tiny chip for your XBox that gives you 300 games for like $30 dollars.

Pizza comes with pineapple on it.

Hamburgers come with pineapple on it.

A maid is 54 pesos an hour- less than $5 USD – and she will bring you a 3 milk cake and a present for your birthday.

Your Mexican income tax bill for the year is $80 dollars.

Beautiful sunsets every night.

Shrimp and seafood are one of the cheapest foods you can eat in Puerto Vallarta.

I moved to Puerto Vallarta from the U.S. almost 2 years ago and it has been quite the experience. I’m planning to move to Cabo in a few months, which got me to thinking… “if I’d known then what I know now…” Well, it certainly would have made the move easier. So here are a few of my tips for moving to Puerto Vallarta:

Tips for moving to Puerto Vallarta, Jalisco, Mexico from the United States.

A few things I wish I’d brought when moving to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico:

Electronics, books, and computer software. Electronics are easily double or triple the price in the US. This includes computers and pc accessories, cell phones, stereos, TV’s, etc. Even paying for shipping, you will save a significant amount of money compared to the price of purchasing new electronic equipment in Puerto Vallarta.

Books and magazines in English- Shape magazine is $9… if you can find it. Books are nearly impossible to find.

Software- really expensive, hard to find, or pirated copies poorly disguised as the real thing. Really best to purchase before moving.

I also wish I would have brought a dehumidifier- they are impossible to find here but you will be grateful if you have one. I lost an entire closet of designer clothing to mildew, even with the moisture absorbers.

Cosmetics and beauty products. Quality American cosmetics and beauty products are not available in Puerto Vallarta. Occasionally you will luck out and find Neutrogena, but it’s possible that was a one time occurrence. For example: Walmart now carries a few John Freida products- never more than 5 or 6 on the shelf and it sometimes takes a month for restocking. Also, keep in mind that most beauty products here are stocked with locals in mind- if you’re looking for blonde hair dye, you won’t find it easily!

Linens here are stiff and hard. If you’re used to top of the line Egyptian Cotton, bring it with you!

Furniture in Puerto Vallarta is almost always hard and uncomfortable; beds, chairs, sofas- all worth importing or plan a trip to Guadalajara for furniture shopping.

And finally, a car. I purchased a Jeep Cherokee here for about $2,000 more than it would have been in the states… and this was after they came down on the price! If you can drive a car or have it brought down, it’s worth it. Depending on the year of the vehicle, you will have to pay an import fee and register it here, but this with the price of the trip will still be less than if you buy something locally. If you must purchase your car here, try have a local friend help you out- they’ll know where to take the car to have it checked out, what questions to ask regarding import/registration fees already paid, and of course, help lower the price.

What I could have left behind in my move to Puerto Vallarta:

What I could have left are most of my designer clothing and high heels- cobblestone streets ruin shoes and humidity eats fine fabrics. It’s not uncommon to go to your closet and pull out a shirt with mildew on it after even a week.

If you’re not too attached, there’s no need to bring decor items- the art scene here is one of the best in Latin America and plenty of international decor stores and boutiques.

Advice for preparing to move to Puerto Vallarta- about the actual move, choosing a neighborhood and finding a home?

There are a few neighborhood guides online, including on insidepv.com, with pictures and video of the areas. It’s relatively easy to choose where you want to be, because Puerto Vallarta is divided into 5 distinct areas- Marina Vallarta, The Hotel Zone, Centro (Downtown) , Old Town (Zona Romantica) , and Conchas Chinas to Mismaloya area which covers the crescent beaches that stretch south of Puerto Vallarta.

The marina is pricey, surrounded by a golf course and yacht slips, fine dining and art galleries.

The hotel zone is a strip of resorts and modern shopping centers. These two areas resemble southern California or Florida.

Centro is downtown Puerto Vallarta where the famous malecon (boardwalk) is located- loud, popular with tourists, fast paced.

Old Town Puerto Vallarta is slower paced, trendy, more traditional with cobblestone streets, residences, bars/clubs, and endless boutiques- this is also the popular gay area and has become quite stylish.

Conchas Chinas to Mismaloya is the area south of Puerto Vallarta. Known for the “crescent beaches” this area is lush in tropical foliage and lined with villas and luxury condominiums overlooking private beaches and the ocean.

We’re in the process of adding videos and photos of each of these areas but some are already posted in the photos and videos section of Inside PV.

What I miss after moving to Puerto Vallarta:

What I wouldn’t give for mayonnaise without lime in it, crunchy peanut butter, and organized grocery stores.

Things to expect if you move to Puerto Vallarta:
When the phone company says they’ll be there Thursday, notice they didn’t say which week. If they said before noon, notice they didn’t say which day. When they don’t show, don’t be surprised when they say, “We had to reschedule” even though they never let you know. In other words- expect no schedules, poor customer service, and a very relaxed attitude regarding matters you thought were important. For most of us, it doesn’t take long to get used to.

Tipping- grocery store bag boys will count the tip you hand them before thanking you. In the states, this would be considered extremely rude- here, I find it amusing and cute. Go figure. Taxi drivers, bartenders, and waiters too will do this, although not in fine dining restaurants such as La Palapa and Cafe des Artistes where the staff actually take courses to learn American culture (as well as about fine wines, cigars, presentation and English.)

Things that will shock you for the first six months:
Chickens and other farm animals on buses. Bus drivers that stop in the middle of their route to do their grocery shopping (leaving passengers waiting patiently on the bus.) Naked mannequins getting into bed in a department store window display for Valentine’s Day. Oh, you know what, this could take a while. I think I’ll make thise one a whole new article!

Things That Will Shock You for the First 6 Months of Living in Puerto Vallarta

Chickens and other farm animals on buses.

Bus drivers that stop in the middle of their route to do their grocery shopping (leaving passengers waiting patiently on the bus.)

Naked mannequins getting into bed in a department store window display for Valentine’s Day.

Grocery shopping: Buying eggs in a bag- I still plop them on the counter, forgetting they’re not in a carton. Mayonnaise mixed with lime- the only mayonnaise you can get here. No crunchy peanut butter and only one brand of regular peanut butter in the Puerto Vallarta grocery stores. Pudding is not kept with Jello. Prices for products in the “American Section” are twice as much as 2 aisles over. The same product is located in 4 different places throughout the store- all with different prices.

The price for a taxi is $5 dollars cheaper when you ask in Spanish.

Go to walmart to buy a frying pan- they have 40 of the same 1. You ask the salesperson when they will get more and he says “next year.”

Geckos walking around your living room. Leave them alone- they eat mosquitoes. Gecko Warning: They like sugary cereals, so keep it in tupperware or you’ll have a bowl of Frosted Gecko cereal.

The bus will take a “shortcut” to avoid traffic… causing you to miss your stop.

In downtown Puerto Vallarta, the local funeral home closes off one of the busiest streets (the street that directly turns onto the highway) near the malecon so the grieving family can sit out in the street in plastic white chairs. Thousands of buses, cars, etc are backed up, and quietly and respectfully detour around the street.

Milk – Puerto Vallarta has two kinds of milk- regular and light. Light tastes like 2% in the states and they don’t have it everyday.

Television: A preview plays for the exact movie/show you’re watching, during it’s own commercial break. The same 4 shows play back to back for a 24 hour period. The same episode of Everybody Loves Raymond plays for 3 months.

Don’t be surprised if you’re standing in a grocery store line and a lady passes you her baby while she fishes around in her purse to pay. Likewise- locals think nothing of picking up a child or baby that is not theirs. I almost fell over when I went to a soccer game and one of the players came over and handed me an 8 month baby boy to watch while he played!

A local taco stand also sells bras and key chains.

Mexican home remedies offered by my husband’s 90+ year old Mexican grandmother: A boiled avocado pit is the local aspirin. Spit on the feet, wrap in socks when you have a cold. Bronchitis or flu- massage. Baking soda, lime, salt mixed are used instead of alkaseltzer.

Traditional Mexican foods the locals eat here: Instead of spaghetti sauce, the locals like to mix their pasta with mayonnaise (BLEH!) Corn with mayo is another favorite.

Old milk is not thrown away- when it’s good and rotten, they mix it up like cottage cheese and eat it- it has a name which I’ll write as it’s pronounced rather than massacre the spelling: ho-ko-kee.

Pizza is topped with ketchup.

Sushi is served with jalepenos soaked in soy sauce instead of wasabi. Or… served with salsa and a tortilla. Yep, it’s happened.

Around Halloween, they put 2 or 3 pumpkins out at the store for Americans to buy and mark them “Halloween” so they’re not bought to eat by the locals.

The local chihuahuas walking down the beach wearing heavy turquoise jewelry.

Very, very large European men in Burberry bikini bottoms sunning on the beach. With or without rear end implants.

A Thanksgiving Turkey is $80 USD. A can of Cranberry sauce is $4 USD. A pint of ice cream is $8 USD.

Puerto Vallarta’s South beaches include Los Muertos Beach, Playa Mismaloya and Los Arcos, Boca de Tomatlan, Playas Conchas Chinas,

South Puerto Vallarta crescent beaches include Playa Gato, Los Venados, Los Carrizos, Punta Negra, Garza Blanca, Gemelas.

Beaches far South of Puerto Vallarta: Yelapa, Las Animas, Quimixto

Central Puerto Vallarta offers the beautiful beach along the Malecon.

Beaches along Puerto Vallarta’s north end include Playas Camarones, Las Glorias, Los Tules, de Oro

Puerto Vallarta’s Marina beach is El Salado